Tuesday, August 25, 2009

A Passion for Passion


This is a story that has been six years in the making, yet I will try to be as succinct as possible in the telling.

I met DR six years ago in a yahoo group about television and popular culture. We hit it off right away...possibly mainly over our shared amusement over another frequent poster who was (and still is, come to think of it) rather stick-up-his-ass-ish about any number of topics. Anyway, DR and I began corresponding privately and things very quickly got very cute. I think I can honestly say that I loved him almost immediately. I could see what a good man he was...kind, funny, honest...and when I saw his picture I went - Yeah, that's my guy right there. And I could feel how he cared for me. The problem? He lived in North Carolina and I lived in Southern California. The early intensity diminished. Sometimes, after awhile, it was hard to think of things to say. Distance isn't good for love. That is just reality. Or reality as I know it.

Still, we stayed connected in one way or another. We always wrote. We always had our little things to laugh about. I always felt my life was richer knowing he was there in the world. Three years ago, almost exactly, when he came this direction to visit his family we were able to get together for a few hours. I know I wrote about it on here. I loved seeing him, but of course we were right back where we started...3,000 miles apart and life goes on. And we went on too, in our way, keeping in touch, going through periods of great longing, but having to let that go. Crazy-making.

About a year ago DR made a move to Utah. It was actually romantically motivated...although by this time, I was not the object of the romance. You know what though? I have to be a little grateful. I would NEVER have asked him to move across the country for me. And the person he did move for ended up proving what a bad, bad idea that is. Okay, in this particular case anyway. It is unfair to generalize. But...there is DR, so much closer, and not so stoked to be there. And by this point we are talking, talking, talking...going over our stuff, this shared history we'd accumulated. When DR started talking about coming here to be near his family I will admit that the idea was alarming in some ways. After all this time, we could actually be together, have a relationship. But we kept talking...and I felt his genuine love, without any sort of pressure. It was there though, always.

I'm not sure what happened. Maybe it was his patient reassurance. The fact that in one way or another, we've loved each other for the past six years. That we now have a shot at real and profound happiness together. I let down my guard, letting myself love and be loved. Right now, we're still apart, but not really. We're together and if you check my right hand column you'll see the countdown clock for when we will be able to actually be in the same place at the same time. This is a very 21st Century love story. But it is a love story all the same. And that was not very succinct....but I tried.

12 comments:

Tara said...

Isn't it amazing how life works? He'll be so close now, and October 21st is really not that far away either! I'm so happy for you, LB!! Couldn't have happened to a nicer person. You must give us some details of your reunion!

AlienCG said...

Congratulations, Laura B. I hope for nothing but the best for you two crazy kids.

Quit it, you're making me think that there's some hope for technology after all.

MrManuel said...

That is an awesome, awesome story Laura and I am so happy for you! Is he moving to the same city or will it still be somewhat of a travel to see him?

So awesome! Keep us updated!

cornbread hell said...

dang it!

Ananda girl said...

Yay! I believe in happy endings... I do, I do, I do!

I am terribly, awfully, and wonderfully happy for you both!

Churlita said...

It seems everyone is hooking up. I love it. It gives me hope. Sometimes all it takes is patience. I'm so happy for you.

laura b. said...

Tara: It is kind of amazing and I can't help feeling lucky. I'm sure I can be persuaded to share a thing or two :-)

AlienCG: Aw, Alien...thanks. And it is true...technology looms large in this story. Think good thoughts...

MrManuel: Thanks so much :-) When he first gets here, he will probably stay at his sister's house and will be about 40 miles away. Not ideal, but not at all unreasonable I think. Nice straight shot.
You know I will keep you updated.

Cornbread Hell: I know, right?

Ananda: I believe too. Why not? Thank you so, so much xx

Churlita: There are some unlikely elements here...yet it seems like it might just come together...hope is important. Thanks, Churlita :-)

Pamela said...

Yay! Wonderful! Maybe someday something like that will happen for me. Sigh...

The Furtive Wangler said...

What amazing stuff that old love thing is! The countdown timer is a rather cool touch.

laura b. said...

Pamela: As I've found out...you never know.

FW: It is amazing :-) And yeah! It is kind of nice to watch the seconds race by.

Sebastien said...

I am so excited for you! Distance is a killer, but it's great that you were able to stay connected, one way or another. And now you will be together, hooray!!! I'm sure it's exciting and nerve-wracking, but he sounds like a very good person...

I can't wait to hear more.

laura b. said...

Sebastien: Thanks, Sebastien. Exciting and nerve wracking is an excellent way to describe the situation...and you're right, he is a very good person.
More to come :-)