Today is Handsome Lad's 11th birthday. Since he is my baby, his birthdays always seem especially poignant to me. His milestones are always more final feeling than they were with the others. He is almost through with Elementary school and it is a shocking feeling because I have had anywhere from one to three children in attendence at that school for the past 18 years!
On Saturday, while I toiled at mi trabajo, WTG took Handsome Lad and one of his friends to Scandia. It's a little family amusement park with a few rides, miniature golf, go-carts and an arcade. The boys had a great time and stayed all day.
Here they are on their favorite attraction, the go-carts. Handsome Lad in front, his friend right behind him...
On Sunday, as I mentioned, we did the whole family thing.
Now it is his actual birthday. I made him some cupcakes to take to school and we were supposed to have a nice family dinner. Not sure of the status on that, given the most recent melt down. I guess as the day progresses I will find out.
I can't help but take this Handsome Lad post to express my regrets for all that his dad and I have done to him. I really do feel like he got the worst end of the two of us as parents. By the time he came along, we were already becoming quite estranged from each other emotionally. So much had already happened and having another baby (surprise!) didn't provide the magic fix for making us into a committed and loving couple again. He has had to live through the tensions in a more real way than the older kids, who are of course much more involved in their own lives. This isn't to say that they aren't affected, but I really do feel he has suffered in ways that they haven't. I blame myself. I blame WTG, who has taken Handsome Lad's love for him and used it like a weapon against me. There was quite a scene last night, with WTG shouting to HL in the other room that I was going to try and take him away from his father and his home. That was pretty messed up.
So, I'm sorry Handsome Lad. He doesn't deserve any of this. He is a wonderful, sensitive, sweet little boy, who deserves to be having a happy birthday.