I think I've brought this topic up in the past, but not on Choose and Defend. I've had it on my mind, so I thought I'd invite you to join me in thinking this over. Although, during the course of our lives we all fill many different roles...in general, do you tend to find yourself acting as....
A Giver
A Taker
Again, no one is always one or the other. But I do think we tend to fall into one category or another. Sometimes because of who we are and as a correlating factor...who we surround ourselves with.
Go ahead - Choose! Then, in comments, Defend as enthusiastically as you can manage :) Looking forward to your responses! Choose and Defend.
10 comments:
I predict you're going to have more givers than takers, as everyone prefers to think of themselves in a positive light. I'm tempted to take taker just to be contrary, and in fact I think I will.
Taking comes in lots of forms, and one form is passive aggressive giving. "I don't care, whatever you want to do" sometimes really means "I give and give, validate me."
I will also take your peanut butter cups. In a heartbeat. No mercy.
I'm more of a giver than anything, I think. As the person above me pointed out, most people like to see them in a positive light..so maybe I convientely "forget" all the taking I do but I'm still going to go with giving.
After some honest introspection...
I'm not much of a taker. Really. I don't like asking or receiving help.
On the other hand, I'm not great at giving either. I'm usually quick to say ok when someone asks, but I don't go out of my way to look for places/ways to give.
One for 'Giver'.
I'm on the giving side here. It makes me feel good to give when its appreciated. I guess that's sort of selfish in a way. Hmmm...
Um, I'm not sure. I had always thought of myself as a giver, but I think I was perhaps fooling myself, since it's been brought to my attention how much I take. Sooooo... I'll do taker, which, btw, is different than accepting.
I had to be bullied into accepting help when I had my surgery and asking for help is excruciating to me. Getting gifts is also a little embarrassing - I like it, it just makes me a little uncomfortable. But if the giving is affection, then I'm a cat - I can be pet on all day. Still, I lean toward giving - I even wrote a post about how much I love to dote on people. Partly, I guess, because it feels good to me to do it.
I am a giver and The Guy finds it annoying that I can't ask for things and I'm uncomfortable taking things. It's just another annoying "Orphan as a kid" issue that makes me feel like I have to make up for my existence in general. Wow. that was probably WAY more than you were looking for.
James: Interesting p.o.v. and I must agree with you. Both sides can contain a bit of passive aggression, can't they. And if you take my peanut butter cups, I will be all - oh, my figure THANKS you for taking those! One for Taker.
Silver: And really it is not as clearly positive or negative on either side, right? One for Giver.
3GK: I think you and I share some interpersonal traits, I get what you're saying here. Two for Giver.
Silly: See how we can take our most positive qualities and twist them a bit? :) Three for Giver.
NoRegrets: It's been brought to your attention? I'm curious about that! And yes, they are different...how are you at accepting? Two for Taker.
Secret: I may be off on my own tangent here, but I do always think of people who genuinely enjoy preparing food with care as being generous and giving. Four for Giver.
Churlita: It is NEVER more than I'm looking for. And what you say makes a lot of sense to me. Interestingly (at least to me), I have known people with similar backgrounds who come to feel that they are now owed a few things for their troubles :) Five for Giver.
Everyone: So we have it at 5-2, with Givers in the lead. Let's make that 5-3, as I'm going to go in myself as more of a Taker..and an accepter, come to think of it. Anyone else want to join in this discussion, should please feel free to do so!
As a blogger, you certainly are a giver.
Dmarks: That is very kind of you! Thank you :)
BB: I know I got an email that you'd commented...did blogger eat it? Stupid blogger....
Post a Comment