The Bugs Bunny Bubble Blowing Wand!

Enjoy two, two, two Taradays in one!



Now, get out there and blow 'em away!

Oh, and here is a fishmonger too...



Oh, oh, and the President I chose is so obscure there is no photographic evidence or any other kind of evidence that he actually existed. haha! Just trust me. You know you want to.

My Evil Interview

These questions are courtesy of our own Evil-E over at Son of the Noise. Good questions, E and thank you!
Okay, here goes:

Use this statement for numbers 1 and 2:
Suppose you were dropped off on a deserted island for 7 years:

1. If you could only have one book with you, which one would it be and why?
This is very tough! I guess I'd have to go with a volume of The Complete Works of William Shakespeare. That way when I got bored I could act out the plays. And he is kind of a fun guy sometimes.

2. One other object of yours could go with you beside the book, what are you taking?
So many possibilities, but since one other object of any kind probably isn't going to make too much difference in my quality of life I think I will take another book. Lets say, One Hundred Years of Solitude by Gabriel Garcia Marquez. That just seems cool, right?

3. They are going to build a statue in your honor....

a. What will the statue be for?
Helping children everywhere appreciate the value and pleasure of reading!

b. What pose are you in, ie siting, standing, etc...?
I think sitting in a comfy looking chair, ankles crossed demurely.

c. What are you holding or what kind of symbols surround your likeness?
I am, of course, holding a book. Perhaps there is a little group of children gathered at my feet looking up at me adoringly. haha!

d. What does the plaque say?
"She tried."

4. Which event would you rather be a streaker at, the Ocars or the Superbowl? Why?
No one wants to see that! But if I had to choose one or the other, I guess the Oscars because it is indoors and wouldn't be so cold...

5. This is the old last meal question....if you had to choose a soup, a salad, a main dish, a side dish, a dessert, and a beverage for a meal, what would they be?
I will have creamy tomato soup, caesar salad, a filet mignon medium rare, a side of fettucini alfredo, a hot fudge sundae for dessert, and to drink I will have an ice cold Dr. Pepper. Now that is the last meal of champions!

If you would like me to interview you then post a comment stating just that. I will email you some questions which you can answer and post on your own blog.

Bring Your Daughter to Work Day

I guess it is, right? Or for the more liberal among us, Bring Your Child to Work Day. No one here did that. See, we go to work to get away from our children! Geez!
Actually, I have had all my children at work with me at one time or another. It is sort of fun, but also very worlds collide-y. Work l.b. is not quite exactly the same as Home Mom.
Do any of you have worlds that you don't like colliding? Like one group of friends that must never meet another group of friends? Tell us all about it, p-p-p-pleeeeease?

I Think I May Actually Be Back

Whew! WTG is now breathing on his own, taking liquids, and out of the ICU. He will probably be hospitalized for at least two more weeks, but the very worst of it seems to be over. Now that he can speak for himself I don't need to be right there all the time, so I have with great relief returned to work...and blogging :-)

I have missed my blogging friends so much! I will do my best over the next few days to catch up with all of your blogs...hate to think of all I've missed. xo.

Things to Know When Someone You Know Gets Critically Ill

1. The people around you will react exactly as you imagined they would. If you knew they wouldn't be any real help, I assure you they won't. The people you normally count on will save the day for you.

2. Medical personnel have a difficult job, but don't let them leave you out of the loop, dismiss your concerns, or treat you like an idiot. If you want something from them ask for it as clearly as possible and they will usually work to accomodate you.

3. Don't let yourself get so tired that you become ineffective. You need to stay sharp.

WTG is still very ill. They are saying pancreatitis...he is on a ventilator, his kidneys have shut down, as has basically his whole gastro-intestinal tract. Not even a right bastard like him deserves this kind of thing, so I continue to be his advocate. When he gets well he fucking better appreciate all me and the kids have done. And he might want to consider kicking his precious brother and dad to the curb. I will never forgive them for the way they have acted during all this.

Please Excuse Any Absences

Hi. We're sort of having a crisis at my homestead. WTG (the kids' dad), who I don't speak of very kindly, but still... he is having a health crisis. Right now he is in ICU with poor liver functions and pulmonary problems. He's been there over 24 hours, but they still aren't entirely sure exactly what is wrong with him. They are thinking gallstone pancreatitis. All we keep hearing is that he has lots of stuff going on and he is very sick.
Until we get a handle on this, I may be somewhat AWOL. We are trying to arrange things where he doesn't have to be alone, so for an unknown amount of time I anticipate being more at the hospital or home with the younger kids than at work / online. They are being very nice at my job about it.
Please think good thoughts. Thanks.

Ooooohhhh! She's so Van Gogh! (renamed) Oooohhhh! She's so Picasso!

In honor of today's Tara-rific holiday I have Van Gogh'd myself. You should try it! It is actually very theraputic :-)



As Evil-E pointed out in comments this is much more Picasso than Van Gogh (I was NOT an art major, clearly.) Instead of cutting off something, I added some things. Thanks E!

THE Ultrasound

Today was the big day when my son and his girlfriend had THE ultrasound...the one where she was far enough along to be able to determine the baby's gender. Well, first of course, we were all happy to learn that the baby appears healthy and normal at this stage. Everything is where it should be and all that.
We had all made our predictions and guesses in anticipation...some of us were right and some of us were way off...as it turns out....



I am so excited :-)

Recorded for Posterity

Just so I don't forget, because it NEVER happens these-a-days...I finally managed to get in a long lunch with Team C. 'Bout time, I say.

Test Your EQ

Your EQ is 133

50 or less: Thanks for answering honestly. Now get yourself a shrink, quick! 51-70: When it comes to understanding human emotions, you'd have better luck understanding Chinese. 71-90: You've got more emotional intelligence than the average frat boy. Barely. 91-110: You're average. It's easy to predict how you'll react to things. But anyone could have guessed that. 111-130: You usually have it going on emotionally, but roadblocks tend to land you on your butt. 131-150: You are remarkable when it comes to relating with others. Only the biggest losers get under your skin. 150+: Two possibilities - you've either out "Dr. Phil-ed" Dr. Phil... or you're a dirty liar.

What's Your EQ (Emotional Intelligence Quotient)?

I am remarkable at relating to others....barely ;-)

My Pact with the Cosmos and How It Failed

Are you one of those people who imagines that you can control the state of your body with sheer mindpower? I am. I always truly in my heart believe that I can will myself to stay well, even when people are dropping around me like flies. Starting last Tuesday family members began..oh, lets just say...vomiting. Not everyone all at once. It crept up on us. First the baby, poor little Miss Personality. By the time she was recovering her mama was sick. Then by Thursday night, Handsome Lad was down hard, it was ugly. Kick Back Dude got it too, but was able to slough it off after a good night's sleep, sort of. By Friday evening, when they were on the upswing, Girlie Girl was aching and feverish. During all of this I was making pacts with any force that cared to listen.
I CANNOT BE SICK!
I WILL NOT BE SICK!
IF I SERVE EVERYONE SELFLESSLY, I WILL STAY HEALTHY!
PLEASE?!?!?!?
That should work, right? It didn't. I spent Saturday night dead sick. Passing out on the cool, cool bathroom floor sick. Without the fun of being drunk before...
Luckily, I was able to get lots of rest on Sunday. I put everyone on notice and took to my bed, getting up only to run a load of laundry or two, and help the kids keep it together mealwise.
By the time I got up this morning, I was tickety boo.
In conclusion, even though it didn't work out this time, I am pretty sure that next time I can keep from getting sick like everyone else. Don't ask me how. If I told you my method I would have to kill you. bwahahahaha!!!!

One of Those Memes Your Friends Send You When They're Bored and They're Hoping You're Bored Too

I am posting this because I am uninspired I guess. I do always rather enjoy these, though. Doesn't everyone like talking about themselves? Anyway, if you like to talk about yourself, post this on your blog too! If you don't like talking about yourself, post this on your blog anyway, but make sure every single answer is completely inaccurate!

1. What time is it? 2:00 pm

2. What is your full name? Ah, sweet mystery of life! Just call me l.b.

3. What are you most afraid of? Pain

4. What is the most recent movie that you have seen in a theater? It has been awhile...probably Notes on a Scandal?

5. Have you ever seen a ghost? I don't think so.

6. Where were you born? Phoenix, Arizona

7. Ever been to Alaska? Not yet!

8. Ever been toilet papering? I spent half my weekend nights when I was a teenager doing this.


9. Loved someone so much it made you cry? Certainly.

10. Been in a serious car accident? No. *knocking on wood*

11. Do you plan to have any more children? No more!

12. Favorite day of the week? Probably Sunday...

13. Favorite Restaurant? Pomona Valley Mining Company

14. Favorite Flower? Any kind, sincerely. I love flowers. (Okay, who doesn't? But really!)

15. Favorite Holiday? Not a huge holiday fan, in general, but I like Thanksgiving quite a bit.

16. Favorite sport to watch? Track and Field

17. Favorite Drink? Rum & Coke or Amaretto Sours

18. Favorite Ice Cream? Mint & Chip w/ chocolate sauce

19. Favorite fast food restaurant? Carl's Jr.

20. What color is your bedroom carpet? I have hardwood floors, with a beige throw rug.

21. How many times did you fail your driver's test? Never!

22. Before this one, from whom did you get your last e-mail? My friend Lab Rat.

23. What do you do when you are bored? Read, usually. Sometimes I throw in some eating too.

24. Bedtime? Usually around midnight

25. Who will respond to this e-mail the quickest? Probably no one since I am doing this on a Saturday...

26. Who is the person you sent this to that is least likely to respond? That prize is up for grabs :-)

27. Who is the person that you are most curious to see their answers? I love reading these things. I appreciate all comers!

28. Favorite TV shows? Grey's Anatomy, House, Desperate Housewives, American Idol (sue me!), Big Love, The Sopranos, Rescue Me.

29. Ford or Chevy? I drive a Chevy, baby!

30. What are you listening to right now? Low level talking with the occasional piercing voice of a young child.

31. How many pets do you have? One dog, Tank, and one cat, Mittle Kitty.

32. Which came first the chicken or the egg? If I knew the answer to that I would totally write a book and get rich and give up this life of wage slaving!

33. What would you like to accomplish before you die? I want to continue to learn every day of my life.

34. How many people are you sending this e-mail to? I'm not sure yet. Not many.

35. Time now? 2:30 pm (I had some interruptions!)

l.b.'s Recommendations

Here are some things that I can personally recommend as being good stuff:

The Handmaid and the Carpenter by Elizabeth Berg
When Madeline was Young by Jane Hamilton
The River King by Alice Hoffman

Neon Bible by Arcade Fire
Wincing the Night Away by The Shins
OrdinaryWorld by Get Set Go

Go on and give them a read or a listen if you are so inclined. And thats all I have to say about that!

P.S.-I am sorry that this is an exceptionally uncommentable post, but say hi to me anyway, okay? Thanks :-)

World Poetry Day

Since today is World Poetry Day, officially and all, I thought I would celebrate by doing a little writing. You know I love poetry, although I have sort of let my haikus go. Maybe I will take them up again. Deal with that threat! Okay, anyway, my poem is inspired by a recent staff meeting.

In the Conference Room

In the Conference Room we gather
Coffee cups in hand
The more organized among us
Bring pencils and pads
But most of us know
That will just make it harder
To peel a banana or destroy a donut

In the Conference Room we gather
The Director speaks first
She is quiet and humorous
But her word will be law
Each Assistant Director speaks
They are equals on the flow chart
But any fool can see who rules

In the Conference Room we gather
Let us go around the table
Gleaning knowlege from one another
Will it be about work?
Mostly no
But some people do take
Some mighty fine vacations

In the Conference Room we gather
Eyes on our watches always
Must she ask another question?
Did he have to bring that up?
Will this meeting ever end?
Finally it does
And we are released for another week

I guess that would be called very free verse...only very loosely poetry. But hey, turning one of those meetings into poetry of any sort was a challenge! I know some of you write poetry too. Lay it on us.

Gemco: Where Babies Come From!

Sometimes when I get all Talking Heads and start asking myself, “How did I get here?” I simply cast my mind back to my days at Gemco and it all begins to make sense. I worked at Gemco from 1981, until it went out of business in early 1987. Gemco was one of those large discount stores, like K-Mart or Wal-Mart, sort of…a little nicer I think. Anyway, it seems like all the young people working there were bound and determined to either get pregnant or get someone else pregnant. Nothing struck me as unusual at the time, but looking back I am somewhat astonished. The year I became pregnant with my oldest son there must have been at least five other girls in various stages of pregnancy. On the other side, there were at least as many young men who were also starting a family. All of us relatively young and only a couple in really, truly stable relationships. Was it contagious? Subconsciously, did the idea somehow spread amongst us? We certainly weren’t making the big bucks at Gemco. There was nothing in any of our lives to suggest that this would be a great time to bring on da baby. Nothing to suggest that when my oldest son was five months old, I’d think – hey, why not another while we’re at it! So, I guess when I say it begins to make sense, it actually doesn’t.
Let this be a lesson to your youngsters out there. If you work in an environment where all the kids are doin’ it, just say no :-)

Missionary Position

Every fourth grader in California studies California history. I suppose it is the same in other states...it is the year for State history. In the fifth grade, they study U.S. history. But I am getting ahead of myself there. Today, I am talking about California history. A big component of which is apparently the mission system. Fourth graders from far and wide come from the beginning to the end of each school year requesting books and other materials for reports and building projects relating to one or more of the 21 missions in the system. This year my youngest son studied Mission San Juan Capistrano. That is how I happen to know that today, March 19, is the traditionally noted day for the swallows to return to the mission each year. It is a big touristy deal. Mission San Juan Capistrano is quite beautiful and looks like it would have been a fabulous place to live back in the day. I haven't seen all 21 missions, but they all appear at least in pictures to be lovely. Unfortunately, the mission system was corrupt and cruel to the Native Americans whom the missionaries and soldiers "recruited" to help build and maintain the missions. The goal was to instruct the heathen natives in Catholicism, make them into Spanish citizens so that they would have to pay taxes to the Spanish government, at which time the missions would be secularized and turned over to the Native Americans to run as profitable settlements.
I have had to learn about missions five different times, so I consider myself quite the expert. Now you know a little something too. Just in case you ever have some 9 year old Californian coming up to you wanting a little sumpin' sumpin' about the bad old days of the Mission system. Word.

Geese

I played a choosing game over at Evil-E's House O'Pain and am now compelled to tell you that geese can sometimes give their gender away just by the size of their goosey tools and sometimes you have to do some special procedure if you need to know if you have a goose or a gander.
Oh, and there was a picture of geese in winter. And that is all I gots to say about that. There you go, E! I invite all others to go tempt fate and play the game.

Oh! Today is the Two Year Anniversary of My Boring Life!

It was two years ago today, l.b. taught the band to play. Okay, no, sorry. I can't believe I have been keeping this blog for two years. Please celebrate by reading some random post from some random past month. Or just read the last few...they are all kind of the same anyway....
Happy Anniversary to My Boring Life!

Friday Night Lights

Tonight those lights will consist of the light cast by the television screen and Miss Personality's night light. Dear grandmama gets to babysit while Kick Back Dude and Princess Diva go out to see Jim Norton at The Improv in Ontario. Ah well, someone might as well be having fun tonight!

I hope some of you have great big plans tonight. Even if the plan is just get your tv and wine on why not tell us all about it? What are you going to do on this fine Friday night?

A Day for the Boys

There must be a few amongst you who know what today is. See, the thinking is that the ladies have their day on February 14. They get the candy, the flowers, the shiny bobbles. Um, sure. Anyway, what's in it for those of the male persuasion? Well, I guess if they are very good they will get to celebrate today. March 14 is designated as Steak and BJ Day. I don't know...it doesn't seem quite fair to me. I guess I'd go ahead and skip the whole Valentine's shinanigans if I could celebrate, say...um....Taco Day? Oh god, I'm officially a pig. See what involuntary celibacy will do to a usually nice person?